I delight in the Holiday Season. I am one of the the freaks who gets a warm good feeling the second I see Halloween decoration pop up in the stores - (even when they appear next to old swimsuits and pool toys). The traditions of the holidays lure me in. Family - Holiday - Tradition, they go hand in hand. They are an essential ingredient in our celebration and connection. As we grow, meet new folks, learn new observances, form new circles and families, we naturally merge new traditions with some of the old. We hold onto and create holiday traditions to bind us to those we love.
Psych Central’s article Why Holiday Traditions Might Be More Important Than You Think by Michele L. Brennan, Psy.D., says:
Holiday traditions are essentially ritualistic behaviors that nurture us and our relationships. They are primal parts of us, which have survived since the dawn of man. Traditional celebrations of holidays has been around as long as recorded history. Holiday traditions are an important part to building a strong bond between family, and our community. They give us a sense of belonging and a way to express what is important to us. They connect us to our history and help us celebrate generations of family. Most people can say, “oh this was great grandmas table cloth we always used for Thanksgiving” or “I remember stringing popcorn with my mom when I was young”. They keep the memories of the past alive and help us share them with newer generations.
Although holiday traditions are are usually the fist thing people think of when you mention traditions, they are not the only ones families have. Whether its stringing popcorn for the Christmas tree, watching the Thanksgiving Day parade while the turkey cooks, building sand castles every summer or regularly having family movie night, they are a family ritual that brings children and parents closer. These moments create positive memories for children and provide positive events for everyone to anticipate! Children crave the comfort and security that comes with traditions and predictability. This takes away the anxiety of the unknown and unpredictable. Traditions are a wonderful way to anchor family members to each other, providing a sense of unity and belonging.
Once you get started making traditions during the holidays, you can start branching out to make new traditions throughout the year. Start a pizza night, a movie night, or even board game night. Make birthdays a special time for the celebrant to pick the cake and their favorite dinner. If these things arent what you had in mind, traditions can be the annual family vacation where you spend time together every year.
Traditions not only unite us within our families but across cultures, ethnicities and borders. Most of the holiday traditions we enjoy here in America hail from variety of different backgrounds. Santa Claus is a mixture of Saint Nicholas, Odin, and pagan folklore. Halloween combines Celtic celebrations with Christian All Hallows Eve and was entrenched in America by the Irish. Kwanza values and practices are crafted from countries all across Africa. Thanksgiving is brought to us from Native American and European cultures coming together in gratitude for harvest and friendship.
The holidays can be busy and stressful. Even following the traditions we value and look forward to can make us anxious. Will my pie taste as good as the one aunt Mary always made? Is it OK for me to buy my kids Halloween costumes when my mom always made mine? The traditions do not exist to cause us stress and worry. They are there to help us celebrate. Holidays are for coming together to joyously acknowledge and commemorate events that are important to us. As we hold, share and build traditions, we connect to our past, cherish today and mold tomorrow.
Dr Brennan says: “If there is a simple take away message here, its that traditions nurture our spirit and are an important part of family bonding. They can be anything fun you and your family already enjoy doing, or you can have fun starting your own.”
Your holiday traditions don’t have to be perfect, they just have to be “yours.” Nurture and build traditions to share with your family, friends and community. We will all be better when you do.